In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal how to overcome yourself.

First a quick update:

ü  Loss of innocence  – Why child actors suffer so much – Corey Haim, Andrew Koenig, River Phoenix, Freddie Prinze, Brad Renfro – each one former child actors who suffered tragic deaths as adults from drugs, depression or suicide. Watch the TV interview I give to the Morning show revealing the factors and reasons so many child actors end up with destroyed lives as adults.
http://patrickwanis.com/Videos.asp

ü  When adding comments to my blog, please allow me time to respond as I choose to make time to write thoughtfully and properly, so always please check back in the blog for my response.

Now, let’s talk about ways to overcome yourself.

The dictionary defines “overcome” as “to get the better of in a struggle or conflict; conquer; defeat: and “to prevail over (opposition, a debility, temptations, etc.)

So what does it mean to “overcome oneself”?

It refers to conquering and defeating that part of you that stops you from setting, striving and achieving your goals; that part of you that stops you from enjoying life and living it to its fullest.

So what is that part of you that would want to stop you or sabotage your success?

  Continue reading “Overcoming yourself” »

In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal a few secrets about body language and its application at work, the office and business meetings.

First a quick update:

**** Clash of the egos – Ryan Seacrest & Simon Cowell – Read the full transcript of the interview I gave to Gil Kaufman from MTV news about the two confrontations and run-ins between Ryan Seacrest and Simon Cowell, live on Television, on American Idol last week. Click here:

http://patrickwanis.com/blog/index.php/2010/03/23/clash-of-the-egos-simon-cowell-ryan-seacrest/

Now, let’s talk about body language and how to use it at work and in professional settings.

In my Success Newsletter: “Spotting a Liar” (February 03, 2010), http://patrickwanis.com/blog/index.php/2010/02/03/spotting-a-liar/ I revealed that “57% of all of our communication is done non-verbally (body language – facial expressions, etc.); 36% is the tonality of our voice and only 7% is the actual content – the words. Thus, our body language is the reliable source of what we really intend to say, and not our words. We can speak the words but actually intend a completely different meaning or simply be lying.”

Thus, regardless of the setting, we are always communicating and affecting & influencing what people think of us and to what extent they like or dislike us. What messages do you send out?

Here are some misconceptions about the non-verbal messages we send out:

1. People who look you in the eye are per­ceived as being dominant (no, it can be confidence, control, trustworthiness or anger)

2. Arrogant people don’t smile (no, the smile can be fake, forced or genuine)

3. Holding your head down and keeping your arms folded is a sign of submissiveness (no, it can be dejection, sadness, resistance or a sign of being emotionally shut down)

4. Fiddling, slouching and keeping one’s legs pressed tightly together shows insecurity (no, it can be boredom or nervousness)

5. Holding the arms, legs and face rigid are indications of being cold and quarrelsome (no, it can be listening, alertness, seriousness, stubbornness or preparedness for action.)

Continue reading “Body language at work” »

In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to talk about why conscious choices often fail and reveal the real power of choice.

First a quick update:

ü  Stop self-sabotage – Listen to the controversial interview I give to Jim Peake of MySuccessGateway.com about the real reasons we engage in self-sabotage, find ourselves enslaved to destructive & unhealthy relationships or we constantly experience repeated patterns of failure, and, the link to the Law of Deservedness
http://patrickwanis.com/Law_of_Deservedness.asp

Now, let’s talk about the power of choice – the freedom to choose and the only two types of choices that exist.

Recently, I was having dinner with a friend, Joe and his friend Maria – an intelligent, young woman who just turned thirty. Maria was expressing to me some of her challenges – feelings of guilt and her inability to freely express herself physically in a relationship. “I am full of guilt; I am screwed up”, Maria said. During a lengthy conversation, Maria also told me that she had attended a college course which she believed changed her life. In that course, she said she learned the power of choice. “Everything is about choice”, she exclaimed, almost with a sense of pride.

“Okay”, I said. “So why did you tell me a moment ago that you are screwed up? Why don’t you just choose to be happy and physically free?”

“I am trying?”

“Trying? Why are you trying? Why don’t you just choose? Remember, Yoda said ‘We do or we don’t do – there is no try!’”

“You don’t understand, Patrick.”

“I do understand. You just told me that choice is the answer – everything is about choice; so, why don’t you just choose to be happy?

  Continue reading “Why conscious choices fail” »

In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal the stark differences between love and infatuation.

First a quick update:

ü  Getting over it – If you want to break away from the pain of a breakup, betrayal or rejection and if you want to be happy, excited and alive again, open to love and life, then use my 3 CD set Getting over it. “You helped me to overcome my divorce. I was in an abusive relationship and your help was so powerful to me and inspirational. I am a stronger person now and I feel much better that I’m no longer in that relationship anymore. Thank you so much because I don’t know how I would’ve gotten over it if it weren’t for your help.” – Melissa L.

http://patrickwanis.com/getoverit_package.asp

Now, let’s talk about love and infatuation and how to distinguish one from the other.

So much has been written about love in poetry, music, books, songs and films. Many people have strived to define and even categorize love in its many forms: puppy love, mature love, platonic love, spiritual love, unconditional love, agape love, maternal love, paternal love, tragic love, etc.

There are four different Greek words and terms for love:

Philia refers to love in friendship; the caring and concern for one’s fellow human beings. The city of Philadelphia gets its name from Philia and thus it is known as the city of brotherly love.

Storge – is parental love and affection felt towards one’s children or offspring.

Eros is sensual love; the love of attraction; the concept of being “in love” but it can also refer to an evolved appreciation of one’s beauty inside and out.

Agape – is an unselfish love; unconditional love – when you give without expecting anything in return.

Many people confuse love and infatuation, particularly in the early stages of dating and courting.

You might recall the famous movie and musical “Grease” and the hit song “Summer Nights.” Although the song refers to teen love and the concept of magnetic attraction, it also sums up many aspects of infatuation:

Continue reading “Love or infatuation?” »

In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to talk about angry, nagging men.

First a quick update:

ü  Why we are obsessed with celebrities – Read the transcript of the interview I gave to Diego Rubio from the Colombian magazine Semana, about the reasons people are obsessed with celebrities, how celebrities are created and branded, why we worship celebrities but also enjoy tearing them down, and; the way that the media affects our thinking & beliefs and leads us to conform.

http://patrickwanis.com/blog/index.php/2010/03/02/why-we-are-obsessed-with-celebrities/

Now, let’s talk about angry and nagging men.

There was a very old TV commercial in Australia about a man who answers a knock at the door. The man is obviously frustrated by the disturbance as he proceeds to angrily inform the stranger at the door that he is bothering him, “the kids are screaming, my wife is nagging and I got a lousy sore throat.” The stranger immediately calms the man down as he offers him relief for his sore throat with a lozenge. The man responds with a smile and appears relieved.

Although we all understand that a lozenge is not the answer to our family frustration, the commercial stood out to me because it portrayed the stereotype of the nagging wife. And of course, we often hear the same comment about nagging wives in the form of jokes. However, men – husbands – can also be naggers.

Recently, I was speaking with a friend who is now divorced and she related to me how much happier she is now that she no longer has to hear at home what she referred to as “the male nagging voice.” Of course, that sparked my interest and shock as she went onto explain that her husband would come home from work and often be nagging and complaining about something; often nagging and complaining about everything that she was doing; he would constantly ask her “why?” He would question everything that his wife did and she never felt that she could do anything right in his eyes.

  Continue reading “Angry nagging men” »