In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal the four money personalities; which one are you?
First a quick update:
“Addiction denial — the addict and the family all need help”
In a new series of video interviews that chronicle leaders and developments in the addiction recovery world presented by Milestones Ranch Malibu Treatment Center, I interview Pat Moomey, an addiction interventionist and life coach (with 28 years experience intervening to help people and families suffering from addiction), about how an intervention works. Pat Moomey reveals how she convinces people (who are in denial) that they need help; watch what Pat Moomey says about the entire family being in denial. Watch here.
Now, let’s talk about the four money personalities and their significance. Which one are you?
One of the top two causes of divorce is arguments over clashing values and beliefs about money. When entering marriage or relationship, few people stop and sit down to ponder what their values and deep, hidden beliefs are about money and sex.
Here is an excerpt from my book, “Smash your hidden beliefs – make more money now”:
A few years ago, a 20/20 TV investigative documentary set out to determine some of the values that people have regarding money. It identified that people can be divided into four money types or personalities:
- Spender
- Avoider
- Saver
- Money monk
The Avoider runs away from money, runs away from all financial responsibility, doesn’t want to think about taxes, doesn’t want to think about bills.
The Saver wants to save up money for the rainy day. Did you notice what I just wrote? Save money for the rainy day. Where did I get that phrase from? If you know that expression, you got it from the same place – from your parents. You probably heard them say, “You’ve got to save money for a rainy day.” What is that teaching you? Expect problems, expect failure, expect disaster, expect misery, and so you better not spend that money. You better keep preparing for that day because it’s going to come.
The third money type is The Spender: the person who goes out to spend money like crazy, and usually ends up in huge debts, or loses whatever money he or she has.
The fourth money type is The Monk. The money monk is the spiritual person that believes that all money is all bad: “We shouldn’t have money because God wouldn’t want us to have money. We should be pure and purity means no money, no wealth, no abundance.”
Let’s look at all these four types and be aware that you might be more than just one of them. For example at one time, I was an Avoider and I was also a Saver.
All of these four types come from one thing: fear.
The avoider avoids paying bills, doing taxes. Why? Fear: “There isn’t enough. I can’t face this. It’s too much for me, etc.”
The saver saves out of what? Fear: “I can’t spend that money right now because it may not be enough.”
The spender acts with a different kind of fear and emotion. They try to fill in their emptiness: “I’m not good enough. I have to buy more. I’m trying to escape other emotions, other hurtful feelings and pain. I’ll keep spending.” That’s what an addiction is. Drugs, alcohol and even spending addictions are the same thing – a way to avoid a pain that you have; a way to try to avoid yourself, escape from yourself, or you’re so deadened and numbed you engage in an activity that gives you a rush so that you can try to feel alive.
The fourth type, the money monk, also acts out of fear: fear of disappointing or betraying God: “I must be spiritual. I must be pure. I cannot make money. I cannot be rich. I’m not allowed to make money because God would want not me to do so. And if I do make lots of money, God might punish me or not reward me. I have to suffer, etc.”
Now, it’s time to smash some of these beliefs, right here, right now: the Money Monk belief –the belief that money is bad and impure – not of God.
Moses and King Solomon were two of the richest people in Biblical history. If you research them, you will be amazed by how tremendously rich Moses and Solomon were. King Solomon was said to be one of the richest man that ever lived. What did he pray for? Did he pray for more money? No. He prayed for wisdom. He already had the money, but it wasn’t the money that was Solomon’s challenge that led to his downfall but rather his lack of wisdom by allowing his foreign wives to influence him.
Therefore, if you treasure and prize being spiritual or religious, note that God doesn’t say that you’re not allowed to have money. Someone might have told you that God said you’re not allowed to have money. Why would people teach that to you?
Look at your own situation and you will quickly realize from where those beliefs came. Most of the teachings that say you’re not allowed to have money come from a place of fear and the desire to control. For example, some people who have more money than you might feel that they can control you, that they have some sort of power over you. The origins of taxing reveal a desire to control.
Nowhere in the Bible does it say that you’re not allowed to have money. What counts is what are you going to do with that money? If you’re going to use it for selfish reasons, if you’re going to use it as power over people, if you’re going to put other people down, then obviously, you’re not using money the right way.
Most people who think the bible is against riches and wealth, refer to one of Jesus’ sayings:
“It is easier for a camel to pass through a needle’s eye than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God” (Matthew 19:24)
This saying continues to stir controversy and anxiety for many people. The apostles themselves were disturbed. But most people misunderstand the meaning of Jesus’ words. Jesus was not saying that rich people are bad or evil but rather that wealth can be an insurmountable obstacle if you become so attached to it that it consumes and overpowers you. It’s true that Jesus told a young man to sell all he had, give the money to the poor and literally follow him. But Jesus did not give the same command to every rich person that he met. In fact, the Gospels reveal that Jesus accepted many invitations to rich people’s homes.
In one incident, in a rich Pharisee’s house Jesus instructs his audience that when they invite people, they should invite the poor, the crippled, the lame and the blind, those who cannot repay the host. (Luke 14: 12:14).
Wealthy choices
You have the power to choose in very moment. You can choose to do good with lots of money or you can choose to do bad. Imagine for a moment, if you will that you became someone as wealthy as Warren Buffet or Bill and Melinda Gates. What would you do with that amount of money?
Some people think rich people are greedy, but Warren Buffet, just a couple of years ago, started to give away 85% of his sixty-two billion dollar empire. Where did he give it to? Most of it he gave it to The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Why? The foundation is using that money to help causes such as fighting HIV and AIDS, fighting other diseases, trying to improve schools and libraries. This foundation and Bill and Melinda Gates are putting their money to good use.
I like to think of it this way: It’s much easier for me to help you, to bring you up the ladder, if I’m already at the top of the ladder, rather than trying to push you up. So, if I have a lot of money I can actually help you. So yes, you can do charitable deeds with money. You don’t have to be poor to be pure in the heart or to be pure in the eyes of God. Both rich and poor people can be greedy, selfish, mean and nasty. How you choose to live your life and the way that you choose to spend your money or the way you enjoy your money is up to you, it’s a personal choice.
– From my book, “Smash your hidden beliefs – make more money now”:
And if you would like to learn more about your personality or your partner’s personality, take the personality test. Click here.
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I wish you the best and remind you “Believe in yourself -You deserve the best!”
Patrick Wanis Ph.D.
Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert & SRTT Therapist
www.patrickwanis.com
Anointed “The Woman Expert” by WGN Chicago, Patrick Wanis PhD is a renowned Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert who developed SRTT therapy (Subconscious Rapid Transformation Technique) and is teaching it to other practitioners. Wanis’ clientele ranges from celebrities and CEOs to housewives and teenagers. CNN, BBC, FOX News, MSNBC & major news outlets worldwide consult Wanis for his expert insights and analysis on sexuality, human behavior and women’s issues. Wanis is the first person ever to do hypnotherapy on national TV – on the Montel Williams show.