In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal 7 strategies to help you deal with and overcome fear, anxiety, tragedy and loss in the wake of so many disasters.
First a quick update:
“The Breakup Test”
Are you heartbroken, angry, lost, lonely, confused, depressed, hung up, or pining over your ex? Do you know how your ex is truly affecting you and do you want to benefit from personalize advice, action steps and revelations? Take my free breakup test and get your own personalized report.
“Are You Guilty Or Ashamed? How to Overcome Guilt & Shame”
Do you feel guilty or ashamed for something you have done or for your past relationship or Ex? Do you know the difference between guilt and shame? Watch the video and learn how to overcome guilt and shame.
Now, let’s talk about the 7 strategies to help you deal with and overcome fear, anxiety, tragedy and loss in the wake of so many disasters.
Three category 4 hurricanes, an earthquake, and 123 large wildland fires across the US, all in the space of 30 days! They have greatly impacted the consciousness of millions of people directly affected, and millions more miles away.
Hurricane Harvey is the wettest tropical cyclone on record in the United States. The resulting floods beginning around August 28, 2017, inundated hundreds of thousands of homes, displaced more than 40,000 people, and prompted more than 17,000 rescues.
Less than 2 weeks later, Hurricane Irma (the most powerful hurricane ever recorded in the open Atlantic ocean at 185 mph) devastated parts of the Caribbean before making US landfall in the Florida Keys. The hurricane was wider than the state of Florida; hurricane-force winds hit both coasts of Florida at the same time.
Ten days later, September 20, 2017, the entire island of Puerto Rico was devastated by Hurricane Maria: it is without power, and it is expected to be that way for many months.
The day before, Mexico experienced an earthquake of 7.1 magnitude, killing 274 people.
While the destruction is still visible to people all around the world, and there is loss, pain, fear and anxiety, how does one deal with the trauma?
1. Neutralize the anxiety
Anxiety is the feeling that your world is out of control, coupled with the attempt to try to control that which you can’t. And the harder you try to control things that you can’t control, the greater will be the anxiety, stress, pressure, frustration, fear, and powerlessness.
Make a simple list of the things that you can control and the things that you can’t control. Next, accept the things that you cannot control, and focus your energy on taking action to control only the things you can. You cannot change what has been done and you cannot undo the past. You can, though, create your future.
Lesson: you create your anxiety – control only the things you truly can control.
2. Reprioritize your life
Get clear about your actual priorities. What is truly important to you? Everything that has gone can be rebuilt; some things such as special possessions of sentimental value cannot be replaced. You know now what you need to accept.
Many people spent many years, even decades, building a life, creating a home, amassing possessions, money or material wealth and it is all gone.
Lesson: nothing is permanent. Nothing is permanent!
3. Let go of the attachments
Buddhism teaches that you should never become attached to anything. Perhaps this is an extreme. Obviously, there will be things and people which are important to you. However, when you become overly attached to anything or anyone, then that thing or that person controls you. What is controlling you now? Is it the possessions that are gone?
Lesson: when things become more important than you, they control you! Build things around your life, not your life around things.
4. You’re not the ‘stuff’
What is your identity? Have you been brainwashed into thinking that you are the car, the house, the Rolex watch, the Gucci purse or the amount of money you have in the bank?
Your talents, abilities, skills, gifts, passion, personality, morality, values, character, and your perception of life make you who you are. These are the things that others cannot take away from you.
Lesson: your core essence and your love for life cannot be taken by anyone else.
5. It is okay to grieve
You are human and all humans experience the full range of emotions from joy and ecstasy, to pain, loss, and suffering. It is okay to feel sad about the things you lost. It is ok to feel angry that all the things that you have built up and created over many years are now gone. It is okay to even feel a sense of hopelessness and helplessness. What matters is the way that you will respond to these emotions. For how long will you stay in these emotions and who will you be when you rise up from these emotions?
Lesson: Be compassionate to yourself. You will always have the memories and no one can take them away.
6. Your connections and relationships are precious
At that very moment when you might have thought that your life or the life of others was in danger, what did you actually think of? Was it the money, the house, the car, or the possessions? No. You thought about life itself – the people that you really care about and love. This is the time for all of us to come together. This is the time to help each other; this is the time to be even kinder and more patient and more understanding and more tolerant and more giving towards others!
Lesson: the most precious thing in life is the people you love – your connections – your loved ones!
7. Stop watching the pain and destruction; resurrect hope
The more you expose yourself to the painful images, the worse you will feel. Watching destruction and devastation doesn’t help you and it doesn’t help the people suffering. It does though create fear, hopelessness and nightmares.
Lesson: focus on how you can help, not how much worse you can feel; resurrect hope!
If you need personal help and guidance to overcome anxiety, loss or trauma – book a one-on-one session with me.
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I wish you the best and remind you “Believe in yourself -You deserve the best!”
Patrick Wanis Ph.D.
Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert & SRTT Therapist
www.patrickwanis.com
Anointed “The Woman Expert” by WGN Chicago, Patrick Wanis PhD is a renowned Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert who developed SRTT therapy (Subconscious Rapid Transformation Technique) and is teaching it to other practitioners. Wanis’ clientele ranges from celebrities and CEOs to housewives and teenagers. CNN, BBC, FOX News, MSNBC & major news outlets worldwide consult Wanis for his expert insights and analysis on sexuality, human behavior and women’s issues. Wanis is the first person ever to do hypnotherapy on national TV – on the Montel Williams show.