We Remember Moments, Not Days

We Remember Moments, Not Days

We Remember Moments, Not Days

In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to share a tip on how to enhance the meaning of life by focusing on the moments of life.

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Now, let’s talk about a tip on how to enhance the meaning of life by focusing on the moments of life.

Can you remember a complete day and list all of its details – everything that happened and everything that you did?

Probably not.

Why not?

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” – Cesare Pavese

What are your greatest memories?

Even if you think of a very special day in your life – a birth, graduation, promotion, wedding, athletic or career achievement, etcetera, you will most likely really only remember certain specific moments of that day or event.

Often, though, what we remember the most are actually small yet meaningful moments!

“I was at the playground with my mom and my two brothers. My youngest brother, Sammy, was only around a year old. He was sitting on a swing – the ones for little kids where you stick your feet through the holes – and my mom was pushing him. She got a tiny little smile out of him. When I pushed him, I got a giant smile. He only had two little teeth then, and I could see them both! I have a picture of it and whenever I’m sad I look at it and it makes me happy just to remember that memory.” Amanda Sinderovsky 

It is the special moments in life that are stringed together that help give our life meaning.

Recently, I attended a ‘celebration of the life’ of a female friend who died suddenly and at a very young age. As each person stood at the front of the room to share their experiences and memories of this beloved person, it stunned me as I realized just what a great impact this one young woman had on so many people’s lives – and everything that each person shared about her was one or more special moments with her, moments that would be remembered and treasured for the rest of their lives.

In other words, what remained in the hearts and minds about this beloved person were not days or years but rather the special moments they spent together

Specific moments stand out in our mind because of their emotional intensity. Both positive and painful moments stand out because of the rush of emotions we experienced at that particular moment.

Fortunately, we always have the choice and power to create special moments – moments that we will enrich our lives and which we will remember forever.

How do we do that?

By ‘living in the moment.’

Living in the moment or living in the present refers to engaging all of your senses in what is happening right now, without thinking about what has already happened or what will or might happen later.

Only when you engage all of your senses – sight, taste, touch, smell and hearing – are you able to truly and fully enjoy and experience a moment.

Too often, we are thinking about what is coming next or what we need to do next or what happened in the past, and therefore we cannot fully and wholly experience what is happening right now.

Food is one great example.

We eat multiple times a day but how many of those times are we fully present, focusing only on the food to experience the sight, smell, texture and taste of the food? How many times are we immersed in the experience of eating versus being immersed in the computer, TV, phone or some other distraction?

“Seventy to seventy-five percent of what we perceive as taste actually comes from our sense of smell. Taste buds allow us to perceive only bitter, salty, sweet, and sour flavors. It’s the odor molecules from food that give us most of our taste sensation.” 

Only when we consciously choose to focus fully on the meal are we able to actually enjoy it and intensify the sensations and thus, creating another special moment.

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” That also applies to everyone in your life!

As with my friend who passed away and left hundreds of priceless moments with the people who love her, you too, have the ability to create new special moments for other people.

“What I don’t understand is why do people have to say nice things about us AFTER we die? Why can’t they say, “My mom is such a terrific person”, “you have such a good heart” “she is always ready to help…you’re so good to me…My dad was always there for me…my dad did everything with us…Dad, you’re terrific”? But no, everyone keeps these things to themselves until it’s too late. Listen kids, WE NEED TO HEAR THESE THINGS, AND WE NEED TO HEAR THEM OFTEN. Tell us if you enjoyed your dinner. Thank us if we took you somewhere. Buy us a chocolate once in a while. Show your appreciation. Say it in words. If you will only remember to tell people (or us) after we are gone, it’s very nice, but why couldn’t you have said it twenty or thirty years earlier. It would have made SUCH a difference!” – Anonymous reader

In order to truly enjoy life, we must be in the moment and we must use all of our senses to experience and appreciate every little thing that happens; every little thing which, one day soon, will be a big thing, a big and impactful memory!

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I wish you the best and remind you “Believe in yourself -You deserve the best!”

Patrick Wanis Ph.D.
Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert & SRTT Therapist

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