In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to reveal 5 critical keys to becoming more resilient.
First a quick update:
The Breakup Test
Are you heartbroken, angry, lost, lonely, confused, depressed, hung up, or pining over your ex? Do you know how your ex is truly affecting you and do you want to benefit from personalized advice, action steps and revelations? Take my free breakup test and get your own personalized report.
You’re Not A Victim! How To Get Motivated During Covid-19
Are you feeling sad, lonely, bored, apathetic, helpless or hopeless? Do you feel like a victim? Are you stuck, struggling to get out of bed? Watch my video about how to get motivated
Now, let’s talk about the 5 critical keys to becoming more resilient.
Resiliency is your ability to bounce back from setbacks, disappointments and failures, and to do so with new wisdom, new insights and with added motivation. Resiliency can be developed and enhanced. Most people simply doubt themselves and their ability to bounce back!
Here are 5 key steps to help you build and engage your resiliency:
1. Face the truth
Beware of fooling yourself by avoiding or denying the reality of the situation and the challenges that face you. A realistic optimist recognizes the circumstances and acts accordingly. The optimist says, “No need to act; the rain will stop and the waters in the flooded house will recede.” The realistic optimist says, “We need to evacuate everyone now because the waters are still rising, and then we will need special equipment to remove the water when the rain finally stops.“
2 Identify Your Why?
When you set out to achieve any goal, the ‘why’ is always more important than the ‘how.’ It is the ‘why’ that will keep you going despite all obstacles, and despite everything. What is your meaning and purpose? Why do you want this goal or objective? Is your why greater than you? Is there a connection to someone else or to greater mission or purpose? Perhaps, there is someone who is depending on your or truly needs you.
Again, it is the meaning (the why) that will drive you in spite of the tough times, extreme challenges and in spite of even the suffering.
3 Shed the past
Things have changed and you will need to change to adapt, respond and to succeed. When things change, your approach needs to change. You can’t simply depend on old habits or old ways of doing things. You might very well have to shed your old identity and be open to forming a new identity. Accordingly, there will be the experience of sadness in response to the loss of former things and former goals and past anticipated opportunities. As you shed the past, begin now to focus on excitement and anticipation of a newly formed and envisioned future – even in the face of uncertainty and constantly evolving challenges.
4. Tap Into Your Inner Resources
Write out an experience of a past victory or triumph. Think of that time when you had to overcome great challenges. How did you do it? The first step is that you must have believed in your ability to overcome and to shape your life; you must have believed that there are things within your control – namely, your thoughts, emotions and response.
Next, consider: what inner resources did you use? Think about Psychological Capital such as hope, optimism and a belief in your own capabilities. What else is required of you to bounce back from the challenge; flexibility, adaptability, self-discipline, self-control, reframing (shifting perspective from hopeless to ‘I’ll find a way’), courage, creativity (ability to solve problems), perseverance, humility, managing of your emotions, and willingness-to-learn? Watch my video on Psychological Capital
Remember, the above are examples; what other qualities, talents and abilities do you possess?
5. Ask for help and support
Rambo is a movie. Ego and pride might speak to you and fool you into thinking you can be a Rambo and do it all on your own. However, overcoming and triumphing over challenges requires a team of people. Ask for help and support from your social circle. Choose to brainstorm with others. Find someone who will agree to be your accountability and support partner; you, too, will be their accountability and support partner. When you experience doubt, or when you find yourself lagging in energy, your support and accountability partner will be there to help you up and to remind you of your abilities, resources, and potential.
If you need help to overcome challenging emotions and thoughts, trauma, or the past, book a one-on-one session with me.
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I wish you the best and remind you “Believe in yourself -You deserve the best!”
Patrick Wanis Ph.D.
Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert & SRTT Therapist
Anointed “The Woman Expert” by WGN Chicago, Patrick Wanis PhD is a renowned Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert who developed SRTT therapy (Subconscious Rapid Transformation Technique) and is teaching it to other practitioners. Wanis’ clientele ranges from celebrities and CEOs to housewives and teenagers. CNN, BBC, FOX News, MSNBC & major news outlets worldwide consult Wanis for his expert insights and analysis on sexuality, human behavior and women’s issues. Wanis is the first person ever to do hypnotherapy on national TV – on the Montel Williams show.