In this week’s Success Newsletter, I would like to talk about avoiding selfish people.
First a quick update:
This past week, I stayed in Ionia Michigan to help save a marriage and family and tape it for the Montel show. I can proudly say that their lives have been changed. One of the daughters, Chelsea age 14, tried to strangle her step sister three times and kicked her pregnant step mother in the stomach. She is now a new person. I will alert you about when the show will be broadcast.
Listen to me on Sally Jessy Raphael’s syndicated radio show Tuesday October 23 speaking about Chelsea’s story (from above) and how I helped her
Read my article, “Why Do Women Crave Romance?” You will be shocked by the answers!
For the international traveler, VIVA – Dubai’s glossy women’s magazine will be featuring me in the November issue writing about how to keep the romance alive
Beginning this week, I am writing success articles for Date.com and Matchmaker.com’s weekly newsletter
Now let’s talk about selfish people and why you must avoid them at all costs.
Recently Joel Osteen was on Larry King Live and he made a valid point: If you want to know who you will be in five years, just look at the people closest to you for they will influence you and you will become like them. Joel and I teach that it is imperative to stay away from negative people for I say: “You become who you hang out with!”
So let me ask you, “Who do you hang out with? What kind of people do you surround yourself?”
One of the most destructive types is the selfish person. This is the person who only cares about him or herself and thus ends up having no one else care about her, except herself. But in the meantime, she will drag you down, destroy your self-confidence and indirectly teach you to doubt your self-worth.
Let me give you an example. Mari Anne believed she was in heaven. She had finally found Rick, someone that showed her true love, caring for her, supporting, encouraging and praising her, and giving to her on every level – mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. Mari Anne had never experienced this before in her life. No one had ever treated her this well. No one had ever respected her, cared about her feelings or wanted to give to her. But there was one major block. Mari Anne didn’t subconsciously believe that she deserved this wonderful gift. So instead of embracing it and showing her love and care for Rick, she simply took and took, always wanting more. She expressed her selfishness, often criticizing Rick for not doing enough, and always asking for more, while she continued to hurt, lie and cheat on Rick. She would become so self-absorbed and selfish, never expressing gratitude or appreciation and operating only from the thought, “What can you do for me?”
As I have said in past success newsletters, this is the parasitic relationship. Mari Anne became a parasite feeding off her partner but giving anything back.
So what effect did this have on her boyfriend, Rick?
The more he gave to her, the more she wanted and expected. It was never enough for Mari Anne and Rick started to feel that maybe he wasn’t good enough. Rick wasn’t receiving any love or support from her, she rarely praised him or showed appreciation or gratitude and was always insensitive to his needs and feelings. As time went on and the pattern just continued to repeat itself, Rick started to feel and believe that maybe he wasn’t worthy; maybe he didn’t deserve to be loved, appreciated and treated well. Rick even doubted if he was allowed to express any of his feelings, needs or desires. Rick’s confidence and self-esteem fell into the well. He became frustrated, deeply hurt and wanted to respond with selfishness. After all, Rick was getting nothing and he thought maybe the only way to get anything was to respond with anger and selfishness. Rick was an emotional wreck, feeling helpless and unable to please and satisfy Mari Anne and feeling so empty, constantly hoping and kicking to have his needs met.
The longer Rick stayed with Mari Anne, the worse it became and the harder it became to break away from the vicious and destructive cycle. Mari Anne was not going to change and it was destroying Rick even though he deeply loved Mari Anne. Rick had to make the choice to love himself first, for no one can love you more than you love yourself.
If you would like to have more self confidence and feel better about yourself, use my hypnosis program, “Feel Good about yourself and become more self-confident!”.
Remember to check out my Blog on my website to read my past Success Newsletters, post your comments and take a few exciting quizzes. If you have received this newsletter as a forward and would like to receive all of my newsletters please enter your email address on the home page.
I wish you the best and remind you “Believe in yourself -You deserve the best!”
Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert & Clinical Hypnotherapist
Anointed “The Woman Expert” by WGN Chicago, Patrick Wanis PhD is a renowned Celebrity Life Coach, Human Behavior & Relationship Expert who developed SRTT therapy (Subconscious Rapid Transformation Technique) and is teaching it to other practitioners. Wanis’ clientele ranges from celebrities and CEOs to housewives and teenagers. CNN, BBC, FOX News, MSNBC & major news outlets worldwide consult Wanis for his expert insights and analysis on sexuality, human behavior and women’s issues. Wanis is the first person ever to do hypnotherapy on national TV – on the Montel Williams show.